Why You Must Go Beyond the Lodge Room

In an age of digital connections and casual acquaintances, where can men today go to find true friendship & brotherhood? Well, Freemasonry is fraternity that provides an opportunity to build these relationships, but too many Masons are constraining their Masonic experience to the Lodge room and it’s limiting their ability to achieve the friendships from Freemasonry they set out for.

Now, why would we want to go outside of our own Lodges to build these relationships with other masons? Well, think about your workplace friendships - you might have work colleagues you go for drinks with after hours, but how often are you spending time with them on weekends? More crucially, are these the type of people that if something happens, you can call them and they're going to be there for you?

Limiting your Masonic connections to just your own Lodge is like going on a holiday, but not leaving your hotel room for the entire trip.

I want to start the story of Mario and Jean-Paul which demonstrates three crucial elements of building Masonic brotherhood: stepping outside our comfort zones, showing up physically for our brothers, and extending ourselves beyond our regular lodge meetings. Their experience shows how moving beyond the formal constraints of lodge meetings creates opportunities for meaningful connections that embody the true spirit of Masonic brotherhood.

A few weeks ago, during preparations for our grand installation, we needed volunteers to pack gift bags. Two brothers who had never met before - Mario, a young Filipino brother who attends lodge in Leichhardt/Concord and Auburn, and Jean-Paul from New Caledonia who goes to lodge in the Sydney Masonic Center - gave up their Sunday to help. While packing these gift bags, they discovered they were born in the same town. Because of this connection formed during that Sunday volunteer work, when Mario did his third degree ceremony the following Wednesday, he called Jean-Paul to invite him. Jean-Paul, who had never visited this lodge before, didn't hesitate to attend and support his new brother.

Stepping Beyond the Monthly Meeting

Consider the typical lodge meeting structure - you arrive thirty minutes before the meeting for some brief socializing and handshaking. Then you enter the lodge room where it's solemn and sacred, with little opportunity for discussion. You sit there contemplating yourself while watching the ceremony or participating in it. Afterward at dinner, you might have a conversation with four or five people around you. How can we build deep relationships within such constraints?

The formal meeting structure, while essential to our craft, simply doesn't provide enough opportunities for genuine connection. When we confine our Masonic experience to just these monthly meetings, we're missing countless opportunities for building meaningful relationships. This is where daily progress in Masonic knowledge becomes crucial - it might be as little as five minutes reading an article online, listening to a Masonic podcast, or practicing ritual work. These activities create additional touchpoints for connection beyond the formal meeting structure.

Breaking the Lodge Bubble

Every night of the month, across every month of the year, there will likely be a Masonic meeting somewhere in the jurisdiction. If you are available, you would be encouraged to attend those meetings because once a Mason, every Masonic meeting is open for you. While we're all equal and we're all the same, there are different demographics within our fraternity. Some lodges are very much young businessmen lodges. Others might have more men of a similar age to yourself, at a similar stage in their life journey.

By staying within our home lodge, we create a comfortable but restricted bubble. While there's nothing wrong with having a home lodge, this self-imposed limitation means missing out on the broader tapestry of our fraternity. Think about the management meetings, rehearsals, education sessions, and special events that happen throughout the year. These aren't just administrative necessities - they're opportunities to build relationships in smaller, more intimate settings.

Physical Presence in Brotherhood

In today's world, we often fool ourselves into thinking digital connections are enough. We might send a text message or email, post in a group chat, or send a digital gift card when a brother is in need. Your boss might do the same thing. But true brotherhood requires physical presence. It requires showing up, like Jean-Paull did for Mario's third degree.

I know that there are several Masons that I have deep relationships with - if I had a problem today, I could call and one of them would show up. At least one of them would show up. Or if they couldn't show up themselves, they would know a brother or someone else that they would then call to have them come and help me. This isn't about helping someone move house - that might come with deeper friendships later. But when an actual distressful or painful situation arises, there will be people who will come to your aid.

The Key to True Brotherhood

Why must you go beyond the lodge room? Because true Masonic brotherhood isn't found in the formality of lodge meetings or digital connections - it's built through voluntary acts of service, physical presence, and stepping beyond our comfortable routines. The story of Mario and Jean-Paul shows us that when we extend ourselves beyond our regular patterns, we create opportunities for meaningful connections that embody the true spirit of Masonic brotherhood.

Remember: standing in a garage doesn't make you a car, and wearing an apron doesn't automatically make you a Mason. Everyone can go in, do their three degrees, wear the apron, put a ring on and call themselves a Mason. But that misses the whole point. True brotherhood requires us to humble ourselves, remove those material elements, and focus on building genuine connections through active participation in our fraternity.